On Outlet Mall Silliness And How Harper Will Defeat The Lizard Prince


by Sean Orr | Principled loserism: How Harper will win the election. It’s the most terrifying thought experiment of all time, or at least more terrifying than the previous most terrifying thought experiment of all time.

There were attempts to humanize Harper by having him wear sweaters, or photo ops of him throwing a football on the front lawn of Parliament Hill. In the end, says Flanagan: “Ultimately, the main thing has been to portray him as a competent and reliable leader. Someone you don’t necessarily have to feel warm about but someone who will get the job done and deliver results…You’re not going to turn him into pretty boy Justin Trudeau… You showcase what you have.”

‘Harper. He’s a robot, but you trust robots. You don’t trust lizard people. Truedeau is a lizard person. The choice is clear‘.

Making it harder to vote will surely help, too: Government defends strict voter ID restrictions in court. Um, that’s not what we meant by ‘rock the vote’.

Leading to the most poignant Syrup Trap of all time: Harper worried that election might be influenced by voters.

…which is why he’s not showing up to the debates: TV Debate Dates Announced By Consortium. Harper-less debates for a Harper-less Canada.

Leading to the tweet of the day:

Oh, look! BC might actually have some sort of a say in a federal election. How novel! Battleground Watch – British Columbia.

To recap, Harper and the Conservatives have sided with the Eurozone (which is “not answerable to anyone given it doesn’t exist in law“) over democracy in Greece; have sided with international law-breaking Israel; is illegally bombing Syria; may have assisted regime change in Ukraine; have engaged in fraud, vote suppression and vote buying; have blurred the line between public and party business; are making it harder for people to vote; is not showing up to the debates; and does not answer reporters’ questions. Sounds like democracy democratic fascism to me.

Smokers dropping lit cigarette butts could receive a $173 fine. $173? Do you see the irony of that being less than a fine for not producing a transit ticket? Compare this to an old sign on the Hope Princeton highway that read “the one who dropped (the butt) should also be hanged.”

Let it mellow: Metro Vancouver water supply continues to dry up while usage soars. It was interesting playing the Vancity Buzz stage at Khatsalano. Nestea was giving away free samples as I drank motor oil to appease the fracking gods. So many internal personal conflicts!

Banana Smoothie Republic x infinity: Vancouver traffic backed up due to new McArthurGlen YVR outlet mall opening. So, in the middle of a drought, while BC is burning, these pseudo-millionaires bring traffic to a halt in order to get first dibs on so-called luxury items shipped over from China? Sounds about right?

Proposed tower would ‘ruin’ Commercial Drive. Oh, come on! Commercial Drive was ruined a long time ago!

Either way, it’s ok because…love locks! And…cat cafe!

And this: Vancouver record store and live music venue combo first of its kind. Actually, there was this little place called Zoo Zhop that was the first of its kind. Not to mention Red Cat, Zulu, Scrape, and every other record store in the world that has in-store performances.

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