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A Bright Red Ninja Suit That Will Repel The Sasquatches

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(via) As serial campers, we treasure a reliably warm and functional “base layer”. Accordingly, we’re digging the hell out of this Poler x Airblaster Ninja Suit. The four-way stretch Merino Wool and lycra onesie suit comes complete with hood, chest zip, thumb hook cuffs, and a crotch fly for #1 access. It’s bright and weird and the badge makes it clear that you’re not to be fucked with. There’s no way a Sasquatch would dare approach the unpredictable wearer of such an imposing garment. It’s just too dangerous! A little pricy at $189.99, but as soon as we started thinking of it as lingerie it made sound financial sense.

EVERY COOL THING WE WANT

There are 4 comments

  1. The ninja suit looks really baggy, which doesn’t make it a great base layer. Compare the fit on the ninja suit to how Icebreaker or Ibis fits, and you’ll see the importance of trapping warm air next to skin instead of having billowy pockets of thermal inefficiency.

    I like Poler a lot, but this looks like a bit of a style piece. Unless, of course, they’re putting their models and athletes into overly large sizes because they’re stuck in high school and trying to be cool with their baggy clothes and their urban slangs and their hippity hop music.

  2. Hey Mark,

    The only “billowy pocket of thermal inefficiency” here is your face. So much hot air escaping from that thing, not to mention the gross amount of speculation and assumptions that you’re spewing, all based on some armchair gear testing! Clearly, you’ve never used a Ninja Suit, probably not any other of the sub par one pieces out there either.

    As an actual Ninja Suit user, I can tell you that the Ninja Suit is 110% function. It is true that the sizing does run a little bit large, esp if you’re “not in highschool” and want to really show off that tiny package of yours.

    Anyway, enough hating for the day, huh guys?
    I’m here to tell you that the Ninja Suit is a bad ass, completely functional base layer. Honestly, the Merino Ninja Suit is the most functional layer I’ve ever had. I generally put some lightweight merino boxer briefs and a merino t under mine, and its good to go for weeks on end.

    Try it, before you bash it. Enough time on the web, lets go do something!

  3. One brilliant idea the folks over at Ninja Suit had was to offer the suit in a range of different sizes (XS-XXL). Because of this, the customer is able to purchase a size that they feel will fit and function for them the best. It is a revolution!

    As this is a one-piece base-layer, the wearer should have a little bit of extra room when the garment is relaxed, causing the “baggy” look that Mr. Under Armor, Mark, complains about. If you use the archaic “two piece” baselayer system, you can wear your garments much tighter, and also get that nice gap between your top and bottom when bending, allowing for plenty of snow/ice to be packed down your ass crack. Maybe that is what Mark is actually complaining about, not being able to pack enough foreign material in his ass.

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