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Foreign Intelligence Briefing #378: On The End Of Everything Dear & Dodging Satellites

The end is near if you believe the suit above, who says – in addition to his “dream of another recession” – that Goldman Sachs rules the world. “My prediction is that in 12 months, the savings of millions of people are going to vanish.” If Machiavelli and Ayn Rand had a baby and named it Chicken Little, who knew he’d wear a pink tie? Run for your lives!

No bother, the new iPhone 5 long rumoured to be set for an October 4th announcement has been confirmed. Steve Jobs will save the world! Oh wait…

If all else fails, scientists remind us that lots of alternative earths are likely. But until we build a big space ship (shotgun!), tide yourselves over with a font made of bacon and a supercut of people getting high in movies while not minding the colossal carbon footprint of pot growers).

Here’s as legitimate a reason as we’ll ever get as to why the Americans destroyed the Iraqi Air Force before sending in their ground forces.

All this back and forth in Libya is starting to get pretty reminiscent of the Germans versus the Brits in the wake of El Alamein. Amazingly, the rebel charged with taking Sirte from Gadhafi – Major General Suleiman Mahmoud – actually wrote a history of Monty’s tilt against Rommel in these very same locales. He’s now taken the port next to the city, which is to say – if he’s half the nerd I think he is – he’s probably having the time of his life.

Christopher Hitchens on Pakistani Intelligence aiding terrorists. And what happens in slow motion when a water balloon hits your face but doesn’t break? Oh.

King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia deigned to (almost) give women the vote the other day in a charm offensive that fooled hopefully no one: “The king is a realist. He is very much concerned about Saudi Arabia. He feels that if it is not on the train of progress then it will be left behind.” Flash forward two days: “A court in Saudi Arabia has sentenced a woman to 10 lashes for breaking the country’s ban on female drivers.” Sigh.

PS. Remember that massive satellite that was falling to earth? It did, and it missed everyone.

There is 1 comment

  1. That guy on the BBC turned out to be joke. He doesn’t work as a trader for any financial institution, but is just an admitted self promoter. Pretty embarrassing for the BBC.

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