by Sean Orr | Canada’s former defence minister claims aliens are real. Oh, they’re real all right, and they’re millionaires.

Greaseball: Small crude oil spill on Kinder Morgan’s Trans Mountain pipeline generates big reaction. C’mon, Jeff. You’re one of the last good reporters that the Vancouver Sun has left. You know perfectly well that the “big reaction” is due to the plans to double that pipeline, so don’t be silly.

Also because this: Killer whales spotted near Vancouver’s Stanley Park.

Hyperbole lane: People have had it with Vision’s bike agenda. “Vision has aligned itself with scofflaws”. Right, because drivers don’t ever break laws. Also, who uses the word “scofflaw” anymore? Just hurry up and die, Province.

Rescue me: Another quirky idea of housing in Vancouver: apartments build on top of working fire halls. Yeah, how much do you want to bet that the new residents complain about the sirens?

Kitsilano butcher makes own statement on city’s first ‘Meatless Monday’. “Smith received a slew of angry calls on Monday from what she called upset “vege-terrorists,” some of whom apparently believed a false rumour that the water buffalo would be paraded around Kitsilano before being slaughtered like the unsuspecting animal in Apocalypse Now”. Woah, don’t give me any ideas!

Becoming a parody of ourselves: Lululemon wants you for its new CEO … if you speak Sanskrit, sport a third eye and can rock a ‘mansy’.

Local craigslist of the day: A bucket of rusty horseshoes.