On the Trouble With Bloodsucking Vampires and Strangers Asking for Help

Tea & Two Slices is a long-running local news round-up by NEEDS frontman and veteran dishwasher Sean Orr, who lives and works in Gastown, deeply aware of his privilege.

It’s only July 23rd: B.C. declares state of emergency as wildfires grow, forcing more evacuations. How many state of emergencies have we issued in the last five years? Three? We’re clearly in an ongoing climate emergency, so just leave the fucking thing in place. Green New Deal, reinstate Indigenous forest practices, end fossil fuel subsidies, ban fracking…

B.C., Canada, Shell launch $105-million clean energy innovation centre. No big deal. Just partnering with the number 7 emitter of carbon on the planet. Shell is not a green saviour. All this does is socialize the cost and privatize the profit. Look at the money pit that carbon capture is in Saskatchewan. Say it with me: from housing to the environment, the market won’t solve the crises that the market created.

Because when the shit hits the fan, as it currently is, the NDP will blame you. Fatalities are a part of life. You knew this was coming. Just like they’ve done with the drug poisoning. Just like they did with Covid. And just like they’re doing now. Can’t breathe? Find clean air, you stupid proles:

Of course, when people do take responsibility into their own hands and try and save actual human lives, the bootlickers lose their fucking minds: Vancouver city councillor hands out heroin during safe supply protest. So Melissa De Genova has called Jean Swanson a terrorist and now a drug trafficker. Then she bullies Karen Ward, subcontractor for the City, during a council meeting, demanding to know where the drugs came from. Tell me you’re married to a cop without telling me you’re married to a cop! Not only is this akin to demanding to speak to the manager of drug users, it’s also missing the point. Prohibition strengthens the illicit supply chain, and so do police, as Karen points out, when they seize drug users’s supply.

But what do you expect from the jackboots of private property: Toronto police, city staff clear another homeless encampment at Lamport Stadium. “Tensions boiled over”, “multiple scuffles broke out”. They make it seem like some bar fight and not a heavily armed gang throwing unarmed women to the ground and kneeling on necks.

Meanwhile, the other cop spouse on council… Councillor wants to see new community policing centre in Mount Pleasant. How the hell is this not a conflict of interest? Poor Michael Wiebe got dragged through the coals by some NPA goons for asking for patios and somehow this is ok? Community Policing Centres claim to be independent and serve the community but require approval and receive funding from the VPD. They legitimize and increase surveillance, criminalization and harassment of marginalized and oppressed folks.

Which seems to be in direct contradiction with… City of Vancouver responds to calls from community with new Equity Framework.

And this: ‘I’m Not Homeless. I Just Don’t Have an Address’. If people would rather live in tents or RVs, then the housing that you are offering isn’t “adequate”.

Nah, but this is what we spend our money on. This, and sending billionaires into almost space:

Best comment on Reddit: “Isn’t this Vancouver’s official slogan?’

This is also what we spend our money on: CF Snowbirds to fly over Metro Vancouver to honour healthcare workers. If only there was another way to actually honour healthcare workers instead of burning jet fuel in the sky above a province that is on fucking fire.

Developer pitches downtown Vancouver rental development for essential workers. Good guy Jon “Covid is a conspiracy to get young people to be able to afford houses” Stovell; the same guy that was mad about having to put windows in buildings; the same guy that gentrified an SRO complained about poor people, then sold it for a profit, wants to build 104 units of housing (out of 484) for essential workers? Yeah, colour me fucking sceptical.

Housing doesn’t trickle down: Will Speculators Feast Thanks to Vancouver’s Council? 5 years ago Sean would be like hahaha yeah let’s put townhouses all over Dunbar. Today Sean is like this is bad because land prices.

And because financialization… Big ideas on the supply side of housing affordability. I guess raising historically low property taxes is too obvious?

Cool cool cool: Vancouver real estate: Sotheby’s reports surging sales of luxury homes amid strong “local and global confidence. Our small businesses are decimated; our restaurants are struggling; people are dying from climate change; people are dying from poisoned drugs; we’re finding mass graves of children; we’re cutting people out of trees in Fairy Creek; we’re evicting people from Crab Park; and these fuckers are cashing in without a care in the world. They won’t settle until Vancouver is a complete shell of what it once was. They are vampires. Bloodsucking vampires.

Collect houses like you collect cars: If you want to understand the global collector car scene, go to Vancouver. Tax. Them. Into. The. Dust.

Hashtag #IStandWithHarsha shows support for former B.C. Civil Liberties Association executive director Harsha Walia. I mean, this from an organization whose former director stood with the TERFs in praise of “freeze peach” when Megan Murphy spoke at VPL. What’s actually shocking are the rumours that David Eby pressured the BCCLA into forcing Harsha to quit by withholding funding. Wait, that’s not shocking at all.

Where’s the lie? Vancouver lawyer Breen Ouellette makes a case that Canada’s constitution is legislated apartheid. “The only way to interpret Indians among everything else is that we constitute a class of pseudo property under the constitution.” Boom.

This is us: Kelowna RCMP investigating racist tirade as hate crime. “You don’t have to worry about that man” should be a rallying call. You’re not a victim. You’re not oppressed. You don’t have to worry about that man.

Former Burnaby man who fled to China charged in CRA phone scam. And we all rejoiced.

Dan Fumano: First look at Downtown Eastside’s Army & Navy property development. Take a drink every time they say “troubled neighbourhood”.

Honour bound: Go Fund Me for father of four tragically drowns while trying to rescue son with autism.

Bonus: Is This the Beginning of Runaway Global Warming?

There are 3 comments

  1. That VPD sign!

    I’m gonna bike by there later and give it a big hug. I think it needs it.

    I just hope it’s not rigged with some sort of booby trap for if anyone gets too close…

  2. The only thing better than the Cohen/Bosa Army Navy scheme would be a Grimes/Musk/Garossino self driving space condo project.

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