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MORNING PROCRASTINATIONS: On Graceful Robots And Scoring Sad Sex From Your iPad

by the Editors | Around the Scout office this morning, we were scared shitless by the fact that a Coronal Mass Ejection will arrive to Earth from the Sun at 1,400 miles per second today, but we were distracted when we found out that Matthew McConaughey had reprised his iconic role as “Wooderson” from Dazed and Confused in a music video. We were convinced by this illustration on the Islam vs. Christianity debate, and we laughed through some alternate scenes from Return of the Jedi. We were proud of the #Occupy activists in Davos, Switzerland (who doesn’t love igloos?) and we got bummed about the present and future of American political finance reform (wherein corporations, special interest groups, and Las Vegas billionaires decide who will win or lose primaries and elections). Our spirits were momentarily resurrected by Steve Dogs, but then they were dashed by the prospect of a Canadian SOPA. We were amazed at the news that YouTube traffic had risen 25% in the past 8 months (to a now steady 8 billion hits per day) and we were made desirous of this kickass, all-weather notebook. We dreamt about replicating New York’s High Line park on either of Vancouver’s parallel viaducts (Georgia, preferred) and we liked the look of Abraham Lincoln in colour. We were totally gobsmacked by – and joined in the standing ovation for – this robot that flies with the grace of a seagull, and we dug the 2012 Fall/Winter lookbook from Woolrich John Rich & Bros. Last, we were momentarily stunned to discover that people were literally fucking their iPads, and we agreed that American were pretty well screwed when it came to their everyday graphic design consumption. Only then did we get to work. Happy Tuesday, Scout readers. Make it count.