On Harshing Seattle’s Mellow and Living Scared in Other People’s Bank Vaults

Maybe now that Seattle is smoky the rest of the world will wake up and we can stop climate change. Trump reads the New York Times, right? We’re Choking on Smoke in Seattle. Jokes aside, this is a great article that sums up the current psychological zeitgeist of the Pacific Northwest.

I don’t mean to imply that these wildfires and this smoke are the direct result of human-made climate change. I have no idea. I am not a scientist. What I mean is that they have thrown formerly intangible feelings of dread into stark perspective. All week I have stared at the low, dirty sky and thought, “What if this never left? What if it got worse?”

Each time someone makes a stupid joke about the smoke being from a joint or vaping, donate $5 to wildfire relief

Meanwhile, The Province runs a front page that says “It just looks bad”. I can’t really even begin to unpack how insensitive and tone-deaf this is. The elderly, people with lung disease, infants, I mean…fuck, my chest hurts and I’ve been inside on the computer for 15 hours straight.

I know, let’s pack 20 thousand highly intoxicated people into a fire zone that may need quick evacuation. What could possibli go wrong? Shambhala Music Festival warns guests of nearby wildfire, evacuation alert. Yeah…but like…all the good vibes and divine crystal healing energy will save them, right?

It didn’t take long for the BC Liberals to blame it all on the new government:

At least the NDP are taking climate change seriously. NDP government won’t permit Kinder Morgan to put shovels in ground on public land for pipeline. Can they even do this? And who is this Tom Berger guy they’ve enlisted?

Of course, maybe all this is moot and we’ll be living in a nuclear winter in the coming months:

Yes that’s right, I’m about to segue from nuclear winter to housing affordability: What’s In My Backyard? Well, I don’t have a backyard because I live in a condo but there are crows and this morning my cat ate one.

Here’s a brief history of foreign buying of Vancouver real estate.

The mistake most people make when analyzing Vancouver real estate is they compare it to regular real estate markets. However, Vancouver isn’t really a city, it’s a bank. People just happen to live in some of the vaults.

Not the Beaverton of the day: Montrealer sole resident of condo building after other units rented on Airbnb

Craigslist of the day: Here are the 30 Most Batshit Parts From the Worst (Best?) Craigslist Job Ad Ever. Eerily similar to our own Craigslist ad last year.

Seattle council member Mike O’Brien is developing a new proposal that could relax restrictions on parking for homeless living in their vehicles. Perhaps we could make RV Alley official!

That is if our own city councillors weren’t busy fantasizing about the army rounding homeless people up: Vancouver city councillor clarifies comments about rounding-up drug users for treatment. Didn’t Lorne Mayencourt try that exact same thing?

Headline of the day: Burnaby squirrel sparks hydro-pole fire, ruins 82,000 litres of milk.

Canada of the day: Freedom of Information request seeks location of Algonquin Park fishing spot.

Bonus: The Disgusting and Depraved Story of ‘Kenny vs. Spenny,’ Canada’s Most Underrated Show

There are 0 comments

On Schooling Chip Wilson and Downloading the Death Rattles of Late Capitalism

A read of recent headlines teases our sketchy future as an idiot-infested tech hub and reveals some interesting ideas to reclaim the city.

On Ending the Grizzly Hunt and Infiltrating Point Grey’s Mansion Zone

A read of the local headlines reveals Site C reactions, suicidal seniors and Seattle getting an NHL team, among other harrowing yarns.

On The City’s Idea of “Affordable Rent” and Paying For Political Cowardice

A read of the local headlines reveals a proposal to legalise eating people, high rents and a deep dogpile of Site C Dam grief.

On Marpole’s Protestors and The City Struggling to Wake From 10 Year Slumber in Developer’s Bed

A scan of the headlines reveals a broken corporate media and politicians worrying if legal weed will lead to a communist revolution.