TEA & TWO SLICES | On Invented Traffic And Lighting East Van Townhouses On Fire

November 8, 2013.

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by Sean Orr | B.C. government wasted $66M in 12 years on failed reforms, child watchdog says. Sometimes I like to picture the government like this Kids in the Hall sketch.

Vancouver tops L.A. as ‘most congested city in North America’. This entire article is basically a press release for a company that sells GPS devices. It doesn’t take into account public transit, walking, or cycling, all of which Vancouverites value above anything else. But don’t take my word for it: TomTom Congestion Index Useless for Metro Vancouver.

That being said, however, Clark may have reason to regret her transit referendum. I dunno, I just think we’ve come too far to give up on who we are. We should raise the bar.

In other transit related news: Students, please sleep when you’re not on the bus. Something tells me Miranda Nelson just wanted to get on Tea & Two Slices.

‘Sacrosanct’ Agricultural Land Commission eyed for breakup. To be fair, Vancouver’s portion of the ALR is mostly used for rich peoples’ fancy horses. “The question now is whether the generation that inherited this vision and its benefits cares enough to fight to save it”. – Gordon Price.

Vanishing Vancouver: Original houses being demolished at unrelenting rate. Maybe if the land underneath them wasn’t inflated to high heaven…

Gregor Robertson lays out his plans to turn Vancouver into San Francisco. “If we are determined to make the transition to being a ‘world-class city,’ the upward march of prices threatens to become just another fact of life. We need to prepare accordingly”. Or else people will start lighting East Vancouver townhomes on fire

Don’t Hate the Homeless, Hate the System. “The other day I was walking through Gastown and was scolded by an extremely unimpressed homeless man who yelled ‘SMILE. Jeez…’ The immediate thought in my head was ‘Seriously? Fuck yourself. And also, why would I be smiling as I walk down the street by myself? That would make me crazy like you.'” Is this satire? Is this person 12 years old and just realized that Vancouver has a homeless problem? Does anyone in Vancouver actually hate homeless people? Are they talking to themselves? Answer – yes: “Now, some will claim that calling-out the less fortunate members of our community is insensitive. But let me remind you: they were asking for it”. Just…wow.

I Saw You: A train ride from Surrey to the Ivanhoe. Someone turn this into a musical!

Bonus: Elementary school nicknames from Vancouver, turn of the last century. Stooky Morrison? Andrew, you go to school in Mount Pleasant or what?

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