SMOKE BREAK #1019: Highly Anticipated “Google Glass” Product Teased For Testing

I’m totally besotted by this video. It depicts real-world footage from Google’s highly anticipated Glass, the camera-equipped eyeglasses that run on the Android operating system. It’s not because I’m a Google fanboy (I’m not), but rather because I’ve worn glasses every day for most of my life and I’m fucking sick of them. My spectacles do nothing at all except make me see better (and maybe amplify a pre-existing aura of physical weakness), and after seeing this video I know that that is no longer enough. I now require them to make phone calls, provide directions, take HD video on voice command (of whatever I see), and basically do all the things that Siri does. Because progress! And who doesn’t want to do trapeze and skydive? I do, that’s who. And I’d never lose my phone because my phone is on my face. So just take my money already.


7 Responses to “SMOKE BREAK #1019: Highly Anticipated “Google Glass” Product Teased For Testing”

  1. Geebs on February 20th, 2013 5:42 pm

    What could possibly go wrong? I feel like I’ve seen this before:

  2. Mike Babiarz on February 20th, 2013 6:00 pm


  3. Walnut on February 20th, 2013 7:29 pm

    More like:

  4. ACMESalesRep on February 20th, 2013 11:27 pm

    I’ll believe it when I actually see it available for purchase. Until then, it’s vapourware. Ridiculously expensive vapourware.

  5. Scout Magazine on February 20th, 2013 11:31 pm

    I inhale vapourware. I just want what isn’t there. Always.

  6. Scott on February 21st, 2013 2:45 pm

    I just sold everything I own and used all the money to buy stock in Google. Not only will this be insanely popular, but if the rest of the world is anything like my Mother, who loses her glasses on a monthly basis, the repeat buys are going to be huge.

  7. John John on February 22nd, 2013 10:20 am

    It’s a segway for your face!