A no messing around guide to the coolest things to eat, drink and do in Vancouver and beyond. Community. Not clickbait.

TEA & TWO SLICES: On Portland For Just A Buck And Making Snacks With Snakeheads

by Sean OrrThe slow drip of Mother Nature is putting Vancouver residents to the test. Can you please stop saying things like “the slow drip of Mother Nature”? It sounds like she is menstruating on us.

Related? Pure ecstasy can be ‘safe’ if consumed responsibly: B.C. health officer. Anything to get people to cheer up around here. Fuck it – just put it directly into the water.

Vancouver plans to create affordable studio space for artists. Or how about just stop closing all the ones that exist? *cough* Red Gates *cough*

Why study gentrification? Good question. I guess as Ivan Drury put it to me once, perceived gentrification is real, regardless of actual geo-economic circumstances – like how Gastown was gentrified in the 70s, and not with Woodwards. So I leave you with this, why study gentrification?

Because this: Developer loses bid to buy DTES hotels. “Downtown Eastside housing activists are claiming victory after a controversial developer lost his bid to purchase two Single Room Occupancy hotels in the neighbourhood”. I can’t believe the phrase controversial developer even exists. I mean, it is so far beyond an oxymoron that it comes back around again.

The place was buzzing: A swarm of honeybees landed on a cement planter at the corner of Essendene and Gladys streets in downtown Abbotsford on Monday, but has now found a sweet new home and beekeeper in Clayburn Village. “The domestic bees were spotted in the late afternoon buzzing around the corner, with most of them settling on the planter”. An area man said it was the largest single amount of bees he has ever seen since he was in the South Pacific. ‘In them days bees weren’t your main concern’, he continued. ‘Either the Japs got ya or the spiders. In your sleep’. He then began repeating the phrase, “Nurse take me to the Hacienda” at full volume. Police were called to the scene but no arrests were made.

New BoltBus offers $1 fares from Vancouver to Seattle or Portland…with luck. The only catch is that you have to stop at every single shitty retail outlet mall along the way to allow hordes of ylang ylang-drenched octogenarian ladies to run rampant through Reitmans for 35 minutes. Oh, and you can bet your ass the WiFi ain’t free.

All your base are belong to us: Vancouver’s EXP Restaurant + Bar fights ban on video games with liquor service. On the plus side, you gained 15 experience points and your THAC0 went down by 1. You are now a Level 2 douchebag snakehead.

Burnaby snakehead fish sliced open to serve science. Also makes a killer ceviche.

Bonus: Vancouver, WTF

There is 1 comment

  1. I’ve take the BoltBus a couple of times. We didn’t stop anywhere but the border. The WiFi is free (though not reliable).

On Ken Sim’s So-Called “Swagger” and ABC’S Class War

Sean Orr is back from his hiatus with a rundown of the local headlines that have been running on a ticker tape through his mind over the past six months...

On Post-Election Recuperation, Platform Paradoxes and Refund Communities

In his latest read of the local news headlines, Sean Orr finds irony in "safety, affordability, and sustainability", and shouts out a bunch of amazing local organizations working on the frontlines.

On Running for City Council, Playing Whack-a-Mole with Homelessness, and the Public Washroom Deficit

In his latest read of the local news headlines, Sean Orr finds a park ranger with a grudge, a gross misuse of air quotes and Tripadvisor slander.

On Living in a City Preoccupied with Street Cleaning, Chandeliers, and Campaigns Against the Homeless

In his latest read of the local news headlines, Sean Orr hones in on the recent Langley shootings, and the ongoing criminalizing and dehumanizing of the homeless population.