The big Apple announcement came and went earlier today, and there was little rejoicing. Instead of the highly anticipated iPhone 5, the global horde of mouth-breathing tech-nerds were given the iPhone 4S instead (with less Steve Jobs). So what does it have? A new noise reduced, stabilized 8MP camera with 1080p video; a faster processor with a dual-core A5 chip; better, faster graphics; longer battery life (8 hrs talk); better call quality; quicker download speeds; and…”one more thing”…a new voice recognition program called Siri that will take dictation, tell you where to find good Indian food and read your text messages aloud. All good, but if they’d just put a “5” on the back instead of a “4S”, it’s doubtful Apple stock would have just dropped some 4%. Watch the product pitch above.

From GOOD, natch: “Why I Dumped My iPhone”.

Nerd porn: Evangeline Lilly speaking Elvish.

Discover Magazine tells us that psilocybin, the active drug in shrooms, can give those who indulge in it long-lasting changes in personality, particularly in the ‘openness’ department: “One of five broad measures of temperament used by psychologists, this quality is generally defined as openness to new ideas or experiences, awareness of feelings in the self and others, and is strongly tied to creativity and aesthetic appreciation.” After reading the findings, you can purchase by the 1/4 ounce online here.

Medical marijuana user gets narced on to the cops by a pizza delivery dude. Not cool, man.

Bonus: an outstanding Finnish instructional video on how to…er…open a door (click the “CC” button on the video for subtitles).